Nov 15, 2012

EXHAUSTED BEYOND WHAT I THOUGHT WAS POSSIBLE



I haven’t really been keeping you all updated on how my adrenal exhaustion is going, and as things have changed a little I thought I’d give you an update. If you’re not sure what I’m talking about, feel free to read a recent-ish post about it all here.

Since then I felt I was doing pretty well until little by little (of which I was completely unaware of until it all became too much) everything started rolling downhill. 

And the big umbrella sitting ontop of everything else below it was exhaustion. Complete and utter depletion. No energy. No strength. I’m talking lying in bed crying on my anniversary as I couldn’t get up, get dressed, go out. I’m talking lying on the tiles in our apartment trying to read information online for college; pushing myself to study, when my brain is no longer functioning. I’m getting peoples names muddled up at work. Forgetting where things are. Having difficulty in stringing basic sentences together. The thought of standing on my feet all day at work literally brings me to my knees before heading out my door. Coffee does nothing to lift me anymore and instead only makes me want to sleep – where I’m standing. I can’t focus or concentrate on my studies and wonder how I’ll ever get through it all. My list could go on…

The few things I was beginning to do when I last posted about my adrenal fatigue, I am no longer doing for various reasons:

- I can’t sleep in 
- Daily meditating has dropped off although when I’m at home studying and no longer function, I turn on a Yoga Nidra and zen out for 30minutes (usually falling asleep) after which I feel better and can study longer.
- Yoga is a real struggle now I've completely stopped my daily practice. Walking can be just as tough some days. I’m past “tired and wired” and I’m just plain tired.



Nutritionally:
Licorice tea – no longer drinking it; forgot I suppose?
Vitamin C powder – stopped this one too; you might recall my opinions on this from this same post and I didn’t find it to be of any help to me
Less fruit – I’m still going with this, but mainly by default. More than 2 or 3 dates hurt my teeth, mangoes are so good but have given me a sore throat this week. One banana and I’m full (unlike my once 7 or 8)…
Eggs – I’m still eating but not daily, and the usual 2 for brekkie are fast becoming very filling I’m considering just having the 1.
My appetite is not like it used to be either

On-top of all that, I’ve been experiencing more varied symptoms such as:
Put-me-to-bed-now-anywhere-fatigue
difficulty concentrating, focusing and studying
headaches
sore throat
muscle and joint aches; particularly in my knees in the mornings
difficulty sleeping; falling asleep and getting up
I’m always tired; no amount of sleep rectifies this
mild depression due to all this
allergies
abdominal cramps and bloating
no energy or strength whatsoever
shocking immune system the last few months
irritable and the potential to be a real bitch for no reason (just ask Brock)
sighing – this is weird and I’m doing it all the time right now without realizing it
shallow breathing – tough one coz I know I need to breathe deeper but it’s exhausting
forgetting things and muddling things up
wanting coffee all the time but it does nothing for me anymore
struggling to do any exercise
digestive problems
impatient
dark sunken eyes ...

So I’m at the point where I physically cannot do this anymore. Just sitting up to eat my breakfast is difficult; I feel like I could keel over any minute.

Feeling like this most of the time, but afraid to say I don't look so good when asleep

Being a big fan of Traditional Chinese Medicine, I’ve been researching and reading a lot more of my books lately and decided to get myself an appointment with “the TCM guy” up here in Cairns which I am now so excited about! I'm about to jet out the door infacxt! Having dabbled in TCM a bit here and there over the years, and having used plenty of Western medicine (including herbs) and having not much luck, I feel TCM will help me in ways I have not yet felt. And after my emotional anniversary where Brock was feeding fruit cubes into my mouth as I couldn’t move, I woke up the following morning and looking into the bathroom mirror a voice in my head said “I’m prepared to do whatever it takes”. I have a strong feeling this may mean eating foods I have not eaten for years… I have gone over and over and over this in my head, and I think I’m prepared for whatever I may be told is in my best interest to do for my health. I might not have to change alot but I'm used to worrying about everything and thinking everything out, ahead of time, with more unnecessary thinking, and using up energy stores doing so. Thus here I am today. Exhausted.


Cairns Nov 14, 2012

So I will keep you all informed about my progress (I figure I cant get any further down; the only way is up!) and how my appointment goes. With the incredible solar eclipse we had up here yesterday morning; this photo was taken at 6:39am when the moon covered the sun completely and we we cast in darkness for 2minutes. It was indescribable. 
Now is the time to choose the direction we want to go in - 

I Am Perfect Health.

5 comments:

  1. Hi Christie :) I had the same problems as you a couple of years ago. I had been on a full on raw food cleanse for a year and a half but still felt that something was wrong with me. I saw an amazing lady over Skype in Canada who put me on a healing diet which included grass-fed meats and dairy and lightly cooked foods and a nutritional program which helped me IMMENSELY. Then about a year later I got tested and found out I had mercury poisoning! Finding that out was like finding the missing puzzle piece to all my life-long health problems (I don't have fillings so I got it either from vaccines or my mums fillings in the womb). So detoxing that out had helped so much and even though I don't eat meat or fish anymore (except high quality fish oil), I do eat a lot of grass-fed ghee and kefir which helps my adrenals immensely. Also doing a lot of emotional healing as there was a lot of trauma underlying it as well which contributed to the intensity.

    Good luck on your journey! xxx

    Much love
    Rosie

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  2. Wow thank you so much for reaching out and sharing your experiences Rosie :) I seem to be hearing of more and more people near and far to me that have been through similar transitions if not going through them at present. I'm beginning to wonder if a raw vegan lifestyle is just an immensely powerful way to transform one's life, diet, body and thoughts from 10, 20, 30+ or whatever it may be, of eating and thinking crap! In the grand scheme of things and 80-100yrs on the planet in this lifetime, a period of eating only raw vegan foods proves to heal most ailments prior too that time. But I'm seeing more and more that there comes a point where it no longer works, and instead can be quite destructive on the individual. Once the cleansing, healing, gut problems, digestive problems, skin issues, or whatever else it may be have improved, then a change in diet (such as going back to including animal products) works for many people as their digestion is back to where it works best, no doubt thanks to the raw diet. People go on one week detoxes in Spring; I think a few years on raw is a bigger version of a detox and proves of great benefit. I believe long term it can work for some people, but I will not condone it for everyone. Thanks again for reaching out; it's all a big puzzle at times but if we all share what we're going through, or what we have been through, the puzzle comes together much quicker :)

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  3. For sure, that totally resonates. No worries, I'm happy to share as I was so lost at that point in my life and was looking online everywhere for help. I still love raw food and love the benefits of that but it's all about balance for me now. And I love knowing more and more about what my body really wants rather than what my mind is telling me I want. I actually was following Heather Pace's journey when she went onto her healing diet and the lady I connected with also helped her (in Canada). I'm in Australia too if you ever want to connect :) www.facebook.com/healingbyrosie
    Much love :) x

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  4. That sounds like a major depressive episode, you need a psychologist and antidepressants and to change your life a bit to get out of it. Speaking from personal experience as I did not know what on earth was going on too.

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    Replies
    1. Hi Anonymous, Thank you for your comment and your concern. I have suffered depression in the past and know what I'm feeling now to be different, but even if it was depression, my studies and education has taught me alternative methods to help with that condition, and these are options I would take first. Anti-depressant medications are not something I would take again, and not something I would recommend unless extreme circumstances - even then there's alot more going on inside the body that needs to be addressed before drugs are put in. Psychologists and therapists are wonders in talking things out however, and I hope you are well on your way to a healthier happier place if not already :)

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